Ask a black dude

Back again, boys and girls.  And no three week layoff between entries.  So, I’m very proud of that.  For this next installment, I am bringing you one of the most physically talented guys I have played with or against.  He runs like a deer, has an arm like Ichiro, and is just one smooth cat.  A native Texan, Greg Golson.

BV: Alright, Gollie.  This off-season you got traded for John Mayberry, Jr.  And we were in Las Vegas like two weeks ago, and we saw him hit his first major league home run for the Phillies.  You haven’t hit any home runs with the Rangers yet, have you?
GG: No.
BV: Does that make you feel like a complete failure? (Royce Huffman laughs on the couch)
GG: (small laugh) No.  Not at all.  I mean how is that going to make me feel like a failure?
BV: Just compared to his success?
GG: No.  Because he’s had success because he got opportunities.  He got to start in a game.   I haven’t got to start in a game yet.
BV: You know I’m just messing with you, right?
GG: Yeah. 
BV: Now this next question, it’s… I’m not gay, but I stare at you in the shower. (Huffman laughs again)(Golson laughs)  Do you have body fat?
GG: (laughs) No.  I don’t, actually.  I got three percent body fat.
BV: What is it?  Do you do P90X?
GG: No, man.  It’s just God-given.  I’ve never been able to put on weight.
BV: Alright.
GG: Never.
BV: Hypothetical time.  You have all the money in the world, just stupid rich.  You’re throwing a party at your house.  And you can have any musical act playing the party.  Who is it?
GG: Hmmm.  Probably would be Kanye.  Kanye West, his “Glow in the Dark” tour.  That was the best entertainment, ever.  So I probably want to do that one.
BV: Alright.  Okay.  Um, I got to point out… Besides baseball, what else did you do in high school?
GG: Basketball, track, and I played trumpet too.  But it wasn’t…
BV: In the high school band?
GG: No, it wasn’t.  But I had to give it up.  I had to give up band for baseball.  But I did like trumpet a lot.
BV: Okay.  So, what’s a better movie in your eyes, Drumline or Major League?
GG: Major League.  Yeah.
BV: It’s just, I know you like music.  Next one.  In a movie of your life, The Greg Golson Story, who plays Greg Golson?
GG: I have no idea.  Uh, I don’t know.  I have never heard that question before.  I’d say like, I don’t know.  Jamie Foxx, just because he has so many different personalities, you know?  That’s how I am.  You know, on our baseball team, I’m this way.  Around my best friends at home, I’m this way.  Around other best friends, I’m a different way.  Everybody.  I’m different. So, I’d say Jamie Foxx just because he can be so many people.
BV: I like to think, you know, back in the day.  I think Tom Hanks would have made a great Greg Golson.  You know?
GG: Yeah, I was thinking that too.  That was the one I was going to go with.
BV: I watch Splash.  And I say, “That’s Greg Golson.”
GG: Um hmmm.  Um hmmm.  Yeah.
BV: Two more questions.  Alright.  This one’s kind of a serious thing.  It’s kind of going to be a little funky at first.  Brandon Boggs is up in the big leagues which leaves you as our lone African American on the team.  (Golson and Huffman with small laughs).
RH: Oh, wow.
BV: Now, I told you this was going to sound kind of funky.  Is there something wrong in that? A roster of 24 guys and only one black dude?
GG: No.  I mean, the Rangers are going to go after the best possible player.  There’s not that many black dudes playing because…
BV: Well, that’s what more of what I was leaning towards, the decline in African American players in pro ball.
GG: Yeah.  I mean, I definitely think there’s a push to get more blacks in baseball, but, ultimately, it’s up to blacks themselves to get into the game.  And granted, it is a more expensive sport to play when you’re younger.  Because you gotta have eight other guys that want to play.  You gotta have a glove, ball, bat, cleats.  All that stuff.  Basketball, all you gotta have is a basketball.  Football, you don’t really need anything.  But I don’t know.  I think they’re doing a good job of… I came up with the Phillies.  And you know, they… Last year, their top four picks were black dudes.  I don’t know.  I feel like if… Once it gets to point where you don’t look at that, I think that’s when it won’t be a problem.  You know, it shouldn’t matter how many blacks are on a team, or how many whatevers on a team.
BV: Okay.(motion to the bat in Golson’s hand)  Um, I gotta tell you.  That’s a nice piece of lumber you got in your hands right now.  

GG: Thanks.
BV: I got to play against you last year when you were in Reading.  And you had a really sweet piece of lumber. (Golson laughs)  What happened to that bat?
GG: Yeah, actually, I forgot who was pitching.  But I broke it, shattered it.  In the all-star game.  
BV: The Eastern League all-star game.
GG: The Eastern League all-star game.  It was a pitcher from the Red Sox.
BV: Yeah, I remember that dude.  Good looking guy.
GG: I’m trying to think who it was. I don’t know.  He spelled his name weird.  Something… Beo Voggin.
BV: Thanks, Greg.
For all of you scratching your heads about who this mysterious, yet ruggedly handsome Voggin guy is, it’s me.  Yeah, I blew Gollie up inside.  It was a hard one-hopper right back at me.  I sprinted over to first to flip it underhand.  And when I looked up, I saw that I had only beaten Greg by a step.  He’s that fast.  He almost beat out a come-backer to the pitcher.  It doesn’t really matter that the pitcher was slower than… Well, he’s just really slow.
Greg Golson was a member of the 2008 World Champion Philadelphia Phillies.  And he received a ridiculous World Series ring.  And he is, by far, one of the nicest and coolest dudes on the Oklahoma City Redhawks.  



    great stuff Beau,
    My son Connor and I had the joy of watching you in Wilmington and Portland and are happy that you landed with such a great group of guys. The blog is great stuff man. Look forward to reading more,



    I miss you guys. Can we talk about Campaletti next week? Thanks for the shirt you side armed physical specimen. Take care off frank the tank for me. Ask huffy he knows who that is.

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