Out of the gates

Hi.  I’m Beau.  Okay.  Formalities out of the way.  Just so you know, this isn’t a normal blog.  I’m not going to talk about myself, my career, or my experiences in detail.  I figure, I am apart of the number 1 minor league organization in all of baseball, according to Baseball America.  So, with this plethora (big word) of talent surrounding me at the triple A level, why not give you, the reader, something you’ll be interested in reading.  Because, if you’re reading this, you fall into one of two categories.  Either you are a big Rangers fan, or you’re related to me.  The latter, you know me, Mom, Dad.  It is my goal to bring my talented teammates to the forefront by asking them questions most journalists don’t think to ask.  Or they don’t ask because they are ridiculous questions in the first place.  Anyhoo, without further delay, I give you the amazing kisser, the talented, the handsome southpaw, Derek Holland.

BV:  First off, have you ever had anybody interview you just wearing their underwear?
DH:  No.  I can’t say I’ve actually had somebody interview me just wearing underwear.  It’s a pleasure having you for a roommate.
BV:  Why, thank you.  Uh, the other night, you and I compared our iTunes folders for the lamest song.  Which song was determined the lamest?
DH:  It happened to be me.  It was definitely Hanson’s “Mmm Bop”.
BV:  How did that song get on to your computer?
DH:  I use it to annoy people when I play xBox.
BV:  Nice.  I read on a previous interview that you gave that you want to go hunting.  What do you want to hunt?
DH:  I would like to hunt anything, such as a deer, birds, ducks.  Any of that.
BV:  You want to shoot them with a gun?
DH:  Yes.
BV:  You don’t get any thrill of chasing them down with a knife?
DH:  There’s no possible way I’d catch a deer.  A deer would kick my butt.
BV:  Okay.  Uh…Oh, if you could be any U.S. president for a day, who would you be?
DH:  Bill Clinton.
BV:  Why?
DH:  Because he’s the man.  He’s a good role model.  Him, or George W. Bush.
BV:  You’re kind of straddling the fence between a liberal and a conservative.
DH:  I know.
BV:  You realize we play in Oklahoma and for Texas.  Unless I’m mistaken, those are both pretty red states.
DH:  That’s fine.
BV:  Now, the one baseball related question.  You and Neftali (Feliz).  He steps in the batter’s box against you.  You step in against him.  Who has a better shot of getting a hit?
DH:  Well, if he hits me…
BV:  We’re not talking about hitting each other.  Who’s got the better odds of getting a hit?
DH:  I’d probably say…  I’m gonna go me.
BV:  Wow.  Throwing it out there?
DH:  Yeah.  I’m gonna say I have a better chance of getting a hit off him.
BV:  I’m going to make sure to transcribe this to Spanish so he gets the message.
DH:  I’d appreciate that.
BV:  And lastly, I have to ask this.  What is the nickname our Redhawk teammates affectionately refer to you as?
DH:  To be honest, I don’t know.  (Laughs)  But I think it’s Wonderboy.
BV:  Does that bother you at all?
DH:  No.  It’s funny.  I actually think it’s funny.
BV:  Any shot you walk out to the mound to Tenacious D’s “Wonderboy”?
DH:  You know, it’s crossing my mind now.  I actually think that’s what I’m going to do when I get back (to Oklahoma City).  
Derek Holland was a wonderful interview and is a great pitcher.  Look for him in Arlington in the next year or so.  As for me, I just hope my exceptional journalism skills from the years I spent on my high school paper shine through.  
If you have any thoughts or feedback, leave a comment or something.  I could use the help.  
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16 comments

  1. redbirdchatter

    Excellent post. Very funny. Looking forward to the home opener on Friday! I have Redhawks season tickets for the first time. I’ll admit that since I am a Cardinals fan, that I might accidently be cheering for the Redbirds this weekend (oops!) But once they are gone, I’ll be all about the Redhawks! Keep the good interviews coming!
    -Kathy
    http://redbirdchatter.mlblogs.com

  2. hefe300

    Nice interview. Can’t wait to see you guys on Friday. Welcome to the organization. Tell Holland to watch his back after talking about Hanson like that. They’re less than a couple of hours drive away over in Tulsa and surely by now one of them is old enough to kick somebody’s ***. Well, maybe not that middle one who looked like a hot girl, but possibly the other two.

  3. grabsomepinemeat

    Beau: Where did you play high school football and what position? And with humor like yours there has to be a spot in Arlington for you……..we need something to laugh about down here……I’m already thinking that maybe the promotions department should do a Wonderboy bobble head when DH gets called up…….

  4. cj4ball2@gmail.com

    Tenacious D we all aspire to be.

    Nice effort out of the gate. I look forward to more zany interviews. Do you think you could convince Tenacious D to interview Holland to determine in they will let Holland use Wonderboy as his entrance music?

  5. kinch49@yahoo.com

    Greetings. good interview. Hope you keep going with it. Great idea. You can probably get answers that a regular reporter cannot get. My son and I sat near the bullpen in Nashville Monday night when Holland was pitching. You struck me as the comedian of the group. At first, I thought that you were down on Holland, especially with your display after the double play that saved his rear one inning. After discovering that you were roomates, I guess the banter and irreverent stuff works for good friends whereas – it would be somewhat offensive if you weren’t good friends. I was somewhat disappointed to see what appeared to be a divide between black/Latino players and the white guys. Please tell me that I am wrong. You really dominated your time in the game that night,other than the Zinger just past your right ear from the leadoff guy. How did it feel being traded from Boston to the Rangers? Hope you get your chance in the Show.

  6. inthelight33@hotmail.com

    Great interview, I have to say though my favorite piece of your work is your picture on Minorleaguebaseball.com. It’s amazing. Any way Derek, or anyone else in the clubhouse, wants to provide their xbox live name for us? I’d love to play some Call of Duty against some of you guys!

  7. sullivanian@att.net

    Note to Chuck Morgan: Derek Holland…..Wonderboy
    Nice blog Beau Vaughn. Keep pitching like you are and we may see you in Arlington before Holland gets here!

  8. ssarltx

    Great post.

    Welcome to the organization and we all look forward to the future ones. Hopefully, the future holds an interview with Ian Kinsler.

  9. ssarltx

    Oh Yeah, on the subject of entrance tunes, yours wouldn’t happen to be “Wild Thing” a la Rick Vaughn would it?

  10. inahaze

    Great interview, keep it up! It’s refreshing to have a different perspective from that side of the organization.

  11. monkey9375@aol.com

    Just found the blog today. Hilarious (human excrement)! I’m just hoping you can GIVE a post game interview to Erin Andrews in Arlington. Best of luck to all of you guys.

    …BTW, you might need to get with the webmaster of the rangers website and see if he could plug your blog any larger than the 2 pt font in the lower left hand corner of the homepage.

  12. iheart5

    I LOVE DEREK HOLLAND…..HE IS SO CUTE….LOL. BY THE WAY THIS IS MY FRIENDS ACCOUNT AND SHE WAS SO NICE TO LET ME USE HER ACCOUNT SO I COULD TELL THE WORLD THAT I LOVE DEREK HOLLAND.

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